Noah got his 15 month shots today plus the t-preservative laden flu shot. I have read up on autism and vaccinations and I believe I made the best decision I could with the info I had. So there.
Then we came home and Carl was still working at the kitchen table, on the bench. Normally during the day right now I push the kitchen table against the wall, over the bench, to prevent the climbing.
You can see what’s coming. In brief: Noah, dancing with joy of getting to stand on the bench where Carl was working while mum took time to breathe after difficult doctor’s visit, fell.
Badly.
The kind of fall where you don’t even have to ask yourself if you are going to the ER. ‘Cause you just know you are. He fell onto the back of his head on a ceramic floor. With a godawful noise. And a huge gooseegg that puffed out very very quickly. (No passing out or vomiting or anything.)
Noah is fine. We sat in the ER for over 4 hours for him to be seen. He played, walked about, slept a little, and was overall charming considering the circumstances, as long as no nurses came by. He had identified them as the enemy after having to have (oh woe) his PULSE taken.
I was pretty sure after the first hour that he was going to be okay, but the fall was such that I was glad to be spending that time in an ER. Of course next week when he’s sick with whatever he picked up there, I will reconsider.
The fear never ends with kids, and Noah is not the kind of kid that is going to be injury free (we got home: he sobbed because the bench was under the table.) This one though I sort of have to say was foreseeable: I deferred to Carl because I wanted a few minutes off, and Carl was distracted and also just isn’t quite as careful about these things. I’m a bit grumpy with myself for having backed down and a bit grumpy with Carl for having assured me it was fine, and mostly just tired out.
This stuff is still really hard. I’m sure it is for all parents but I’m not sure all parents have quite the same access to experience with just how fragile kids are in reality that I do. Driving up to the hospital I was really, really scared. Right now I am really, really spent. It just took a lot of emotional resources at a bad time of year. I think in March I will lock Noah and myself into a padded room with nothing dangerous in it.
