Another first step
Last night Carl and I left Noah with my mother in law, who was down for the weekend, and went to a concert at the TSO.
!!
We did it with surprisingly little fanfare too; got the tickets at the last minute (it was a special concert geared towards a conference of music educators here in town that they opened up for the public). I was hoping Noah could be convinced to go to bed at 6:30 before we left at 7, but there was no way. He did fine though; he watched a couple of Signing Time videos with her and then fell asleep around 8:45 which is late for him, but not terrible.
I was quite nervous until the concert started and then that took over. Lynn was like… a desert soaking up the rain (ugh how overused is that analogy?). Obviously we need to arrange more concerts for her. It was a nice programme too with the highlight being the Saint-Saens Organ Symphony. (We thought it would be the Beethoven piano concerto (4) but the pianist was a bit off her game in the first movement and I, anyway, never got over that.)
The whole experience of being out at the concert was surreal in many ways. First of all: 3 hrs without a toddler making demands or chores or work! That was crazy! And then I realized that Carl and I really didn’t do much concert going after we sold the house (and not much after Emily died before that either) so it had been a long time, for people who had a subscription for the 5 years before that. And then I was sort of struck by a wave of sad, because I had just a very visceral memory of the night we traded in regular tickets for box tickets to the Rach 3, because I was so very pregnant with Emily, and she moved around inside and we plotted out her future trips to the symphony.
At intermission Carl and I talked about Noah and music, and music, and Noah. Ha. Well at least we got some music in there. We came home to a happily asleep child and a clean kitchen. Go my MIL!
I do feel remarkably refreshed this morning. This may be a clue as to where to go from here, ’cause I’m still feeling a little stuck right now. I also see though that as Noah gets older and can be babysat, that really will make things easier.
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