Dividing this up:
Work
- The beginning has been chaotic – not in terms of actual work, but in terms of not having a desk, phone, network ID, or email address. Can’t print either. I camp out in people’s offices when they are working from home or on vacation, for now. Using my cell phone and my home address. And I can’t print. I don’t think this is corporate policy, but a combination of my team, and that I’m kinda-sorta hired; freelance ’til Nov.
- I’d forgotten the finer points of cubicles, like sound travels. This especially sucked ’cause I started with a cold, which is mercifully going away.
- My direct boss is away ’til late Aug; we had about 2 hrs total together. On my own, I sort of am.
- BigEditor is fabulously smart and I love love love the Sept issue, esp. one story in it that I think would have had trouble being published elsewhere. My writer heart is aflutter. I’m also worried about pissing her off.
- One of the lousy things about a new place is your radar for what is pissing people off is not yet operational.
- One of the members of my team (web) was called an old biddy today, for being 30.
- Harumph.
- I got lost on my first day; went up the wrong staircase (my pass still opened the door) and got turned around. That was kind of sad.
- I have been invited to lunch every day. Everyone packs theirs which is motivating. It is nice to work with food editors.
- It’s a mostly-all female environment. I feel like I’m lost in high school already. I make a bad girl in many ways, and some of the fine details are getting lost on me. Tell me why someone would apologize for eating a boiled egg? It was already cooked & therefore not smelly.
- I think I am going to like most of the work, once I get over the growing pains and the fear. And god, the fear. Today I shared a real idea though… I figured I might as well get fired for outrageous ideas as for not having any.
Noah & family
- Noah is learning at some accelerated pace. I wonder if, like me, he sometimes learns best under pressure. His vocabulary is exploding and he already is doing Montessori routines here, like clearing his plate.
- He learned to say school, for the express purpose of telling Carl and I several times a day that he does not like it.
- He does like playing there and his teacher, according to our inquiries. But he does not like school. Bye bye school. Mommy HOME.
- The school reports he didn’t cry today and seems much happier. But at home, he’s expressing his unhappiness and displeasure and was totally out of coping energy at 6 tonight.
- So, it’s hard.
- Lyria almost had a breakdown today at lunch, in the park, because there was a dad there playing with his son.
- We (no real distinction) did cry today after coming home.
- I sort of feel like this isn’t totally the right thing, on a personal life level. On a professional level it is, and I’m committed now to really giving it a go. But I’m less happy about it than I thought I would be, in that I really fucking miss Noah.
- Carl has really stepped up around daycare drop off and pick up and things, so that’s a good.
