I flew to Montreal yesterday for the day to work with part of the team there and it was exhausting – up at 4:30 to catch a 6:20 flight; home just before 10 after a 7:30 flight back. Partly this is because we live sooo far from the airport, and partly it’s because you have to leave so long to go through security.
I haven’t flown a whole lot post 9/11. I always have thought of myself as someone who could find her way around the airport, but this was based on all the travel I did in my early 20s; I haven’t done much at all since. So when I run into the new airport reality I start to feel like – well, like I perceived my mother at my age, really. Competent but not exactly knowledgeable. The only thing that helped this feeling was using my Blackberry to board with a virtual mobile device boarding pass thing. That was fun.
I’m feeling the same around work. After talking to Sass today (reminds me I have not finished with my gratitudes) I worked out that I feel incompetent at work because my areas of real competence, which are in editorial, have not yet been really engaged; it’s been mostly planning, and so I haven’t been able to BE competent yet. It’s frustrating. But identifying that was good. Of course that means soon I will have a chance to demonstrate incompetence, too. But it does explain for me why I feel so wobbly. I am trying to manage the project of creating the site, which isn’t the job for which I was hired and where I have some skills and stuff, but it is not really “what I do” and so it feels – weird. Aha.
Noah dealt with my long day okay, but was very clingy this morning, so I’m hoping to leave a tad early and go pick him up for some quality hanging out time.
More later. :)
