Le drama, II
And happy birthday Madeleine!
I spent three hours at dinner with one person (my mother) giving me the cold shoulder and complaining and being not very nice. Never said, you know, happy birthday.
In front of my four-year-old.
I don’t know. Now I regret having been the bigger person and not having told them just not to come. I’m actually regretting staying in contact for the years they kept the chairs I TOLD them I had been sodomized over in their home, and everything since. Well, not everything. We have had good times. But I am so angry.
I’m not really sure how you call someone on this. Another vote for therapy I guess.
January 9, 2010 | Filed Under ramblings
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Angry also on your behalf. If you want to, you can regret the good times too, since they are the intermittent reinforcement that keeps you in touch.
I had a bit of family drama on birthday eve and birthday too. Am currently avoiding the topic, but would you a be a bit hurt if spouse reaction to “we’ve been together nearly half our lives” was a visible grimace? Sorry, that’s another topic entirely. Though with the same vote for therapy conclusion.
I am not diving in and giving you advice because I don’t really know that it would be helpful, although I am always glad to if you think it *would* be helpful. I vote strongly for therapy, even if it’s just a few sessions to try to figure this out.
It does seem to me like the goodness of Noah’s relationship with them is going to be under perpetually more tension as he gets old enough to see how they treat you. If you are going to back away from contact it seems like it would hurt him a lot less *now* when he’s more willing to take your word for things, than when he’s 8 or 9 and you’re having to do it because they’ve started guilt-tripping him for not calling or whatever.